Back to Work … Redux

Tomorrow is take two at getting me back to work.

I don’t think I realized how emotional and how draining it would be to get back there, to get back into the swing of things.

So much of my work day involved my husband.  I know that sounds odd, but it’s true.

He cheered me on when I had a success.  He was my sounding board for (non-identifying) vents about clients.  He was my cheering squad when I was feeling unsure and insecure.

He was my company on lunch breaks.

He was the one who cared, who wanted to know that I arrived safely and when I was leaving so that he knew when to expect me.

He was intertwined in every part of my life…  and stepping back into part of my life without him was a culture shock.

Tomorrow I try again.  This time, no wandering around in the snow…

Today, after yesterday’s emotions… I slept.  I hibernated and cocooned and went ostrich.   Tonight I’m feeling better, but still emotional.   Tomorrow will be … interesting.   I’m trying to look at it positively.   I can’t, however, spend my days off sleeping.  There needs to be balance.

I’m hoping that tomorrow night ends in movies and snuggles.   If not, I’ll be ok, but I’d like to have that mental break.

 

 

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One thought on “Back to Work … Redux

  1. I hear you. Texting with my husband brightened every day at work. Being back at work can be very emotionally tiring, but can also bring good structure and connection back into life. It’s a mixed bag. Some days easier than others. But all these obstacles we overcome, as widows, are stepping stones towards better days. Hope you have a better one…

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