I woke up this morning, ran around my house doing tidy up between grabbing a coffee and waking boys up.
Finally sat down to do some stuff on my computer and drink my coffee and…
Not a heavy, something is wrong sigh, but *aaaahhhhhhhhh* relaxed…
As I was looking around my house, at the dog hair on the floor, the laundry that needs to be folded, the craft stuff that’s messing up my table….
I felt at peace.
Last night I had a momentary derailment where the pain was hot and sharp and sudden… the realization of the loss and everything that’s gone hit me and for a moment I couldn’t breathe…
This morning… I’m at peace.
It makes me wonder if he came and talked to me in my dreams last night. I don’t remember, but it’s been a very long time since I’ve woken up at peace.
It was lovely 🙂 I feel positive and good and ready to face the day. I feel like I can do anything.
I still miss him, but for the moment, it’s not the debilitating grief… its more of an acceptance of loss, sorrow over what he’s going to be missing, and happy memories of what we had.
I am at peace.