Father’s Day

I wasn’t thinking about Father’s Day in terms of what it means to me and my boys.   I was thinking about my three step-sons and how I was going to make it special for my boyfriend.

It didn’t occur to think of us… I get to spoil *someone* and be happy with his enjoyment of the day.

And then I saw this:

Father’s Day can be a grief trigger for widowed people in so many ways, here are just a few possibilities:

* You miss parenting with your partner
*Your kids miss their Dad
*You miss your kids Dad, too
*Your partner never got to be a Dad
*You have a new partner who is great with your kid/s, but they still miss their Dad
*You are a widowed Dad, and you miss celebrating this day with your love
*Maybe you also miss your own Dad, if he has died, too

However Father’s Day challenges you, remember that love never dies. Remember that Father’s Day is a reminder of the love Dad’s have for their kids…a love that can’t be erased by death. And if you are in the fortunate position of having even more love in your life this Father’s Day, know that your kid/s will find a way to do the same thing you’ve done, welcome the future, while valuing the past.Give them time and space to find their way, and the unique understanding that only you can give them. 

Every loving person who comes into our lives brings something important, and unique, with them. Embrace love, friends, in it’s many forms, because love lives on and on. 

– Soaring Spirits Loss Foundation
And I remembered… it’s the 2nd Father’s Day without my husband, without my kids’ father.   It’s the 4th Father’s Day since my Dad died.
And that…. sucks.
Seriously sucks.
There’s 4 days until Father’s Day.  I don’t have any plans for the boys and their father.   I don’t have any plans for Father’s Day at all.
Because it hurts again.
I was ok until I saw that.  I’m very good at putting  my emotions in a box and keeping them segregated from the rest of my life… most of the time.
4 days…  And I’m going to do my damnedest to make it happen for my boyfriend and his boys.
But I hurt.
January 2010 039
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One thought on “Father’s Day

  1. Tara says:

    I understand completely. My older two lost their father in late 2010. My youngest and I lost her father 1/2012…I lost my dad in 1987. Father’s Day just isn’t what it used to be… Someone wanted me to watch a touching Father’s Day video and just couldn’t.

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