Changes… and more changes

School starts tomorrow.

I don’t know why that thought is just so…. unreal? surreal? to me.

I am starting school tomorrow for the LPN program.

I have given up my summer job.

I am going to be responsible, to a degree, for other people’s well being while they’re in my care.

But in the meantime… I’m in school starting tomorrow.

My brain can’t quite process that.

I have no cheerleader – my boys aren’t there yet.  Maybe they’re proud of their mom? I don’t know. I know my daughter and older boy are, but they have their own lives and aren’t as involved in mine.

So I’m doing this… just for me.

The whole markandjane thing is gone.  Forever.  And  my Metalhead Poet is not in my corner at this time… so I’m… just alone… in doing this.

I’m going to do it.  It’ll be done.  I’ll be an amazing nurse.

If I can get through the first 3 months.

I’m going to miss my summer job.  But my life is going to change in ways I don’t yet fathom.

I wish I had my cheerleader.  My rock.  My support.

PhoenixRising

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One thought on “Changes… and more changes

  1. Allyson says:

    Well done, congratulations on getting so far 👏😀
    I am 2 1/2 years into being a widow and I can empathise with you on how it feels not to have a cheerleader of our own.
    We definitely have to be our own cheerleaders though and you must treasure every one of your achievements.
    When my eldest daughter was doing her GCSEs and A Levels,her school leaving exams, we celebrated every exam taken and then passed with special desserts at home and it was brilliant. Each time you do tests and exams and make achievements you should go out for ice cream or celebrate by giving yourself a treat like a manicure or something else you like doing.
    Take time for you and remember that you are important too and your husband would want you to be happy 😀

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