How Time Flies.

3 years.  9 months. 9 days.  6 hours. 45 minutes.

That’s how long it’s been since I’ve been Mark’s wife.

That’s how long it’s been since I became Mark’s widow.

I still love him and miss him with every breath.

He’s still the one I want to share the stuff with.

I still say good-night to him every night.

I still cry over him.

Almost 4 years.  And I still can’t believe I’m never going to see his face, kiss him, hug him, or touch him again.

4 years and I’m still surprised when he’s not here.  Even though he’s never BEEN here, he’s never BEEN where I am.  I have NO memory of him in this room, in this house, in this town.

There’s a whole slew of friends who never met him.  And only know him through what I’ve told them.

I think, some days, that hurts the most.  That I’ll never share Mark with my new friends. That I can never introduce them to him.  That people only ever know me as this single mom.

That no one saw me as Mark’s wife, only his widow.

Miss you Mark.

January 2010 036

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3 thoughts on “How Time Flies.

  1. Widow Strong says:

    Beautiful post. I’m 2 years, 7 months tomorrow and I think the same things as you. How is this real? And the knowing new people that will never know Daniel….. that hurts. There’s no way I can describe him to anyone and do him justice!

  2. Gloria Kozlosky says:

    You always describe it so well. I can’t help but cry, for you, and myself. It is a tough road that i never could imagine traveling; heartbreaking every day!

  3. Karen During says:

    My Mark has been gone 4 1/2 years and I still cry every night when I go to bed (not as hard a cry any more), because in the morning that will be a tomorrow we can share. He was my first love and always will be. I miss him, but miss “us” more. Love you, honey

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